Ward Peck's Jersey Tawk: Celebrating more than the vows (Printed Oct. 5, 2007)


I got my Jersey fix last weekend. So that was nice.

My buddy Eric got married to his love, Kadie. And that was really nice.

Getting there from here: not so nice.

But let’s focus on the nice stuff.

Eric and I go way back. His older brother and I had been schoolmates
since kindergarten and Eric is my younger brother’s age. We all grew up
a block away from each other and have been able to maintain our
friendship as we have each grown up and grown out of our childhood
homes.

While there were a lot of nice things about the wedding: the music was
great, the food delicious, the guests in a celebratory mood and the
location spectacular; the nicest thing about the wedding was that it
took place at all – just a few months ago it was unclear whether it
would.

One night during the summer, Eric woke up, as we all do from time to
time, to visit the bathroom. What happened next is still a bit unclear,
but it is believed a cat underfoot was involved and the result was Eric
taking a nasty fall down the stairs. He ended up in intensive care
unconscious and attached to a respirator. He had crushed part of his
skull and there was more than a little concern that had caused brain
damage. In those first few hours the concern about the extent of his
debility took a backseat to concern that he would not wake up at all.

Helpless in Maine, I traded phone calls with my brother and Eric’s
brother, both helpless in the hospital as Eric’s prognosis gradually
improved. Unconsciousness gave way to fleeting bouts of consciousness
and finally awareness. But conscious of what? Would he remember who he
was? How to talk? How to walk? But the question of what to do about the
wedding plans – all but finalized by that point – would have to wait
until those more serious questions were answered.

And ultimately, they were all answered in the affirmative. His
condition improved and his cognitive functions and motor skills remain
intact. Early on he had a few scares: a minor seizure and a word or two
he couldn’t form but with a new emphasis on taking better care of
himself, those appear to have been temporary anomalies.

And so the wedding was on to take place as planned at the Crystal Point Inn in Point Pleasant, JS (Jersey Shore).

Though unsaid by anyone, we all seemed to be celebrating a double
achievement. We were celebrating Eric and Kadie’s decision to spend
their lives together, but we were also celebrating the realization of
that intention to spend their lives together. All their plans, all
their hopes and the daily commitment of building a life together had
all been put in peril by an innocuous trip to the bathroom. The
possible cascade of “what now?” questions never needed to be asked.
Instead the parlor game of hypothetical “what if?” plays on. But I
believe that Kadie and Eric, having been forced to wonder about both so
early in their life together, are better off than most newlyweds.

Congratulations Eric and Kadie.

Oh and one piece of advice: If you’re driving from Maine to New Jersey,
take the Tappan Zee Bridge. Getting to the George Washington Bridge is
not very nice.







 

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